Two words. That is all it takes to lose your individuality. The moment the words “I do” come out of your mouth it is automatically assumed that you and your significant other will be glued at the hip until death do you part. Now I am by no means against marriage; I am all for it considering I married my husband at 23 years old. I am merely speaking out for the women who are judged for leaving their husbands at home to fulfill their passion.
Because I am one of them.
I dread the wide eyes, blank stares and endless questions that I encounter when I first tell someone that I am traveling without my husband. The questions double when I throw in the fact that I take my toddler on my globe-trotting adventures. Travel is part of who I am. I made the decision long ago that I would not give up my desire to see the world for anything or anyone. And now I am blessed to show my little girl the world by my side.
Here are some of the reactions I frequently face and why I choose to travel without my husband regardless of others opinions.
“Why doesn’t your husband go with you?”
He doesn’t enjoy traveling. It is as simple as that. Why drag someone along that doesn’t want to be there in the first place? To be completely honest, I rather travel without my husband. I am the type of traveler that wants to be fully immersed in a new culture and constantly exploring my surroundings. My husband is the opposite. Traveling alone gives me the freedom of creating my own itinerary and not having anyone slow me down. Solo travel lets you wake up in a foreign land and do exactly as you please without anyone dictating you. You only answer to yourself. Now doesn’t that sound like a breath of fresh air?
“Won’t you be lonely?”
Of course I will miss him, but I won’t be lonely. I’ll blame this on being an only child. I can’t think of one time in all my travels that I have felt lonely. Foreign places completely consume me. I become so engrossed in discovering a new city or country that I forget about everything else. Travel gives me the gift of being present in the moment and disposing of my worries back at home. I also believe that time apart strengthens our marriage and makes us appreciate each other more. Distance really does make the heart grow fonder.
“Doesn’t he care that you are taking your daughter with you?”
I am almost certain that every parent would care if their partner was whisking away their child to another country. My husband has every right to worry and he most certainly cares; that being said, it doesn’t mean he would stop us from traveling. He misses our little girl dearly while we are on our adventures, but he also realizes how fortunate she is to be seeing the world at such a young age.
“I can’t believe your husband is letting you go.”
This statement really bothers me. It suggests that I need his permission to travel solo. Yes, I am a married woman; however, I am my own person. I would not be who I am today without my lifelong history of traveling the world. My husband knew this about me before we said our vows and was aware I would travel with or without him. I am fortunate to be married to a man that accepts my constant wanderlust and supports my endeavors. So no, he doesn’t “let” me travel alone, he accepts me for who I am.
So why do I travel without my husband?
Because I would not be the same person he married if I gave up my dreams and stopped pursuing my passion for exploring the world.
Marriage doesn’t dissolve your individuality and should not halt your passions. Traveling solo as a married woman has given me the opportunity to discover who I am when I am not with my husband. It gives me the chance to completely focus on myself and the location that I am exploring without relying on another individual. The amount that you learn about yourself while traveling solo is phenomenal. You will learn how confident, brave and self-reliant you can be and will bring these qualities back to your daily life. Waking up alone in uncharted territory with nothing to do but explore is one of the most invigorating feelings in the world. Unless you venture away from your comfort zone and face the judgement, you will never know how traveling on your own could potentially change your life. Stop waiting around. Stop worrying about what others will think. Just go. Spending your life waiting will only end with unaccomplished dreams and regret.
If your heart is yearning like mine to discover new cultures, meet new people, try different foods and explore foreign lands, then make an effort to make it part of your life.
Break away from the stereotypical married life and join me off the beaten path.
And I’ll tell you what, I’ve never been happier.
-E&A
Traveling Muggles 
Aww I love this post. That’s amazing that you two have a strong enough relationship that you can trust each other while spending time apart! Also, distance does make the heart grow fonder. 😉
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Thank you for reading! Trust definitely plays a big role!
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Love this! Plan on writing my part too. Recently married (4 months) and travel without my husband as well. There are time I feel bad but he also understand why I travel alone. He would love to come with me but couldn’t due to his promotion of being a district manager, always on call and cannot take that much time off as me. However, it really does show how much we miss each other and it brings the excitement out of us when I return home like a reunion and the love grows bigger. I’m just fortunate he let me go.
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Glad to see that someone else still continues their love for traveling while married! We are fortunate to have husbands that understand why we travel alone!
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Agree!
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I really love this. I haven’t gone on a solo travel trip yet but I think it would really help me to grow. My boyfriend is also my photographer like a lot of other bloggers and I feel like that plays a big part in my anxiety to travel alone and do everything myself. I really admire you independence and I completely understand the freedom of doing whatever you want on your trip. You are a rockstar mom !
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Thank you! Traveling alone is so invigorating! Photography does get tricky, but you get creative with propping your camera up on things and using the self timer!
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I’ve already told my boyfriend that I intend for travel to be a big part of my life. He says he wants to go with me though, so I’m actually excited about that (my last boyfriend had no interest in traveling). There are lots of places and experiences that I’d love to share with him, but there are also some soul-searching destinations that I know I’m going to prefer to explore on my own. I haven’t broken the news to him yet though that sooner or later I’m going to ask to get away somewhere for a week or two just by myself. He says he can’t sleep when I’m not by his side haha. Lol love your post ❤
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I get where you’re coming from. I’m lucky both my husband and I love to travel and sharing those experiences together are some of the best parts of our marriage but I can see they flip side too. I have a lot of friends who have done the same.
I would consider traveling with our son without my husband locally but I don’t think I would do it internationally. A few years ago my husband was in the Philippines and I was in Korea alone with our son for 3 weeks. We live here but I don’t speak the language well. There was a freak accident and our son ended up cutting off the end of his finger. Doctors and nurses running around, everyone speaking a language I didn’t understand, blood everywhere, child screaming and no husband/daddy. It was HELL. Luckily I was able to call a girlfriend who could translate but I can’t even imagine if were all alone in a completely foreign country with our son when a major emergency happened.
During the time he was gone there was the finger accident, going to the hospital to have the wound checked regularly, stitches removal, a horrible case of bronchitis where my son was struggling to breath every night and wouldn’t take his medicine, and then he started having nightmares because all this happened and he didn’t fully understand why daddy wasn’t there. My husband still feels extreme guilt for not being there when he was off on vacation. Had he been away on work it’s one thing. But he was off having fun when something bad happened to his family and that kills him.
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Thank you for the honest response! I am always worried about what would happen in an emergency, but I am also a nurse so maybe that is why I feel a little bit better about traveling alone if something were to happen. I just couldn’t imagine never traveling abroad because of my husband. I would have so much regret and want to show my daughter the world. I am so sorry for your scary incident with your son! It sounds so terrifying.
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I always feel a little better that if the plane goes down, we all go down together! Haha
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What a strongly written post, and such a rallying cry for people who love to travel! It’s so great that you can set out to fulfill your passion without your husband being disappointed by the time apart. He must be a cool person – despite the not loving travel thing, which I’ll never understand haha.
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I will never in my life understand the not loving travel thing! Besides that, he is alright 😉 Thank you for reading!
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I love this post! I’m not thinking about getting married anytime soon, but I definitely have the same views as you and I think it’s wonderful that you have this relationship that allows you to still stay true to who you are. Cheers.
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So awesome of you! I can relate to this so much, as I just took my first solo travel trip and left my boyfriend at home. Keep standing up to that sexism and never stop traveling!
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I love this. My parents have taken me on many trips around the world trough my childhood, and it is the best gift I could ever ask for. I’ve seen places my friends haven’t even heard of. I’ve met so many different kinds of people and heard so many stories. My friends got the newest technology and I didn’t have my first smart-phone until Iphone 5S was out on the market. But I thank my parents as often as I can for not giving me that Iphone and instead taking me out, to live!
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This is incredible. It’s an actual fear I have that getting married someday somehow means I lose my individuality, it’s nice to know that you’re going against the grain. Thanks for sharing your story (and your baby is so lucky!)
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Thank you so much! If you find the right person you can still settle down while following your dreams!
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This post is a letter to me. I got married 3yrs ago, we have a son, my husband thinks traveling is rediculus yet he met me while I was traveling solo. I’ve been continuing my travels without him and sometimes I take our son with me. I have questioned if I’m doing the right thing for a long time. It’s true, if I let go of who I really am, then what will I be left with. Long comment but thanks for this post.
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Thanks for the honest response! Our husbands should be friends. You ARE doing the right thing. Settling down doesn’t mean giving up who you are. Continue your travels and never feel guilty!
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Great post! We are travelling as a couple but want to do seperate things, glad to know going your seperate way can still work!
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WOW! First I completely agree: you are married but you are still your own person, with your preferences and your desires which don’t need to be the same as your partner (as it is in your case). I despite people that suggest if he LET’S you do something, he is your/my husband and you/I am grown woman I don’t need permission. When do people think we are living?!!!
When we started dating he didn’t want to leave his city but I pushed him a little bit, now we are living abroad (4th country already!) and he can’t wait to travel more. I can’t think of travelling without him. First, because we would want to see that part of the world too and secondly because we really enjoy having new experiences together. However, if he didn’t enjoy exploring either we wouldn’t be together (as living abroad was a long time dream for me) or I would do as you have.
Enjoy the world and show your girl not only the wonderful world we are living in but that a woman is most of all independent!
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I absolutely LOVE this article!! Kudos to you for keeping your independence!! So many people think that when you are married you HAVE to do everything together…not so…says ME!! Individuality is very important in my mind. What an adventure you and your little one are sharing! Some of my best vacations were when my daughter was small…and it was just her and I! Keep up the good work! 🙂
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I totally relate to this… Keep enjoying your travels!
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Love your honesty and your spirit in pursuing what you really want. Happy and Safe Travels. 🙂
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Both my hubby and i love are passionate travellers but once a year I love going on a solo adventure. He is supportive and I appreciate that he understands. Of course we miss each other but we are never lonely. I totally relate to this post. Thanks for sharing. x
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I am glad you can relate and that you still take time to totally focus on yourself!
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This is so relateable. I’m not married yet, but I am engaged and when I mention that I am going on trips by myself, some people act like I’m crazy. My partner isn’t as interested as I am in travel, but even if he was, I still like to go on trips alone because I like the freedom of being able to explore a new place on my own terms. It’s nice to read a post like this and hear that somebody feels exactly the same. I love your blog!
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Loved this post. I haven’t yet traveled alone, but want to. Just to be able to do something independently.
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Such a great post – exactly what I needed to hear. I have a love of travel and want to explore, my fiancé on the other hand does not. I often wonder if I have the courage and the confidence to do it but after reading your post I’m inspired. Thank you so much!!
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I am so happy to hear that I inspired you! Don’t let anything stop you
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I love your post. I do not travel without my husband because I like to experience everything with him, but I still get the “It is great he lets you book these trips” or we even got last week, “are you sure your wife can handle the finances, I don’t think she can because of all trips shes booked.” like… excuse me?! My husband loves to travel with my son and I or on just us trips. I am envious of women who go solo, not because I can’t, but because I have never done it and really have no desire. You and all other solo women travelers are an inspiration! ❤
I relate to this post on a different level, but very relatable.
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